Back from Ireland. Managed almost a week in the Irish version of Royston Vasey. My cousin Mark came out as being straight, & has apparently had a girlfriend for years. Aunty Marie's first reaction to being told this was "What's his name?" My Aunty Marie is so cool.

For some reason I'm the only person Jack doesn't bite (Jack the pony, not Jack my cousin. Jack my cousin says he only does requests).

Deccie got married on Friday. It would have been Tuesday, but even for devilboy the date would have been too much. Devilboy is mum's nickname for him. She's his godmother & is convinced she should have drowned him in the font. And tells him this. To his face. Sometimes I think she channels Irina Derevko a little too well. It's kind of my fault. I may possbly have caused a little brain damage when I was four. Deccie & I were playing bullfighting & I put the teatowel in front of Aunty Paulines heavy oak coffee table. He's never been the same since.

Destruction of helpless creatures is a trait in my family. Jack kicks lambs (turns out they do move faster if you smack 'em) & Ciaran shot a kitten. He claims it was running off with his dinner, but honestly, the shotgun, Kenny?

Mum took the flight well, considering. She spent the whole time chanting "Why do I watch Lost? Why do I watch Lost?" She won't even fly to Shannon airport anymore, because Uncle William is the air traffic controller & makes our plane circle for hours, just to piss her off.

I will be supporting Germany for the World Cup because their team is hot playing interesting football. And Jurgen Klinsmann is a childhood hero of mine.

Speaking of childhood heros, DJ Carey has retired. I am sad. When I was little I wanted to be DJ Carey when I grew up. One championship medal & a severe knee injury later I've had to scale down a bit :'(

In order to assist other motorists in identifying potentially dangerous drivers, it is now compulsory for anyone with a lower-than-average driving ability to display a warning flag. The flag (consisting of a red cross on a white background) will be attached to the top of at least one door of their vehicle. For drivers of exceptionally low ability, additional flags are required.