My dad and his mate marshalled a race recently, which involved them spraypainting 'HAZARD' over all the dodgy bits of ground in the park. Because they're idiots. They would probably have gotten away with it except the guy clearing up after them is a Police Sergeant. Because they're idiots.

So tonight I went up to the running club with dad, and we were greeted by "There's my suspect!" The guy was handing his phone around showing everyone photos of the mess they'd made. Fortunately dad's mate was away on holiday, so we just put all the blame on him. "I can tell there was a third person involved in this!" said the guy. "Know how I can tell? Because it's spelt right!"